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Thursday, May 6, 2010
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Amma's Darshan
Our time here at Amritapuri is coming to an end, and I couldn't have had a better closing weekend. Yesterday and today are public darshan days, which means Indians from near and far are flocking here. Adam and I were asked to change flats because there are at least 6,000 people to accommodate. We are now on the 14th floor of the E building and I can't complain; the view in gorgeous, the breeze is strong and there are less mosquito's . Yesterday around 10:30am while moving all of our things to the new flat, we heard three rings of the bell which means Amma is coming to begin giving Darshan in the Bhajan Hall.
After a few hours, Adam and I went down to watch for a little bit before our serving lunch seva. The swammies were playing music in front of the bhajan stage and were flanked by two large screens displaying live footage of Amma giving Darshan. It is the most beautiful thing to watch. People come to her with their troubles and she consoles them or gives them firm advice. People offer her platters of food, fruit, and flowers, they have their malas blessed, they have photos of long gone loved ones blessed, they cry in Amma's lap, they beam with Amma, and they tell Amma jokes.
Because Adam and I are leaving on Tuesday, we were able to get Darshan tokens ( which are of course free). We had to wait until the very end, after all the Indians had gone. Meanwhile, we showered and put on our white Punjab's and headed for the bhanjan stage to give prasad for the first time. Anyone can give prasad once a day. We were able to sit right next to Amma for two minutes, and hand her prasad( in this case, vibuuti ash[burnt cow dung],and a little candy all rolled up in a small paper pouch). You always have to watch Amma's hand, she will hold it out and then you gently place the prasad in her hand. It is pure bliss.
Afterwards, we ate an early dinner of Masala Dosa( a rice/mung flour slightly sour pancake cooked and filled with potato, onion, mustard seeds, chili leaves, ginger, and other spices I can't distinguish) and watched Amma on screen for about six hours. For those of you who are not familiar with Amma it is typical that she gives darshan for up to or more than 24 hours without a break. She has hugged over 26 million people. It is absolutely incredible. She is Devi; she has merged with the Divine and she is a fully realized Guru. She barely eats or sleeps, and she has gracefully taken on 90% of the worlds karma. A devotee once asked her if he could take on a small fraction of that Karma to relieve Amma. She gave him his wish and he immediately fell unconscious ; the pain was too great.
When I am in Amma's presence I feel a tremendous calm. She is the mother of all, and I feel her love and energy flowing into me and I can't help but cry because it is all so beautiful. I feel eternally grateful to be here with Amma in India.
Adam and I got in the darshan line around 12:30 with the determination and intention to ask Amma for a Mantra. The Mantra is a secret between the guru and the devotee, and I have heard many powerful stories from friends here who have used their mantra in trying times and felt immense relief. As the darshan line snaked its way onto stage, I got closer to Amma and I began to cry, just out of joy. I handed her my mala, and said, "Mantra, Amma." She blessed my beads and placed them around my neck all the while smiling and then she pulled me into her lap for the hug. She smells of jasmine and sandalwood; she is immortal bliss. Holding me for a while, she whispered in my ear, "my daughter, my daughter," and smiled at me once more, pressing prasad into my open palm. Adam was right beside me asking for his Mantra too. She never replies, but just by asking her it means yes!
We squeezed our way off the stage and stood in the mantra queue. The woman in charge asked us if we wanted our mantras to be formless or include a representation of what god means to us: light, love, Amma, etc...
Adam and I chose formless which means Amma gives us a mantra that is best for us. Around 1:15 am, after everyone had been given darshan the mantra queue wormed its way back onto stage with Amma. I knelt down in front of her and she pulled me in, whispering my mantra into my ear, and loud enough so that one of her swammies could hear and write it down. Next, she showered me with flowers, a few got caught in my hair and I kept them close, smelling them. I was in bliss. Adam received his mantra directly after me and minutes later we were given a piece of paper with our mantra written in Sanskrit and explaining their meanings. We were also given instruction on how to use them. This is truly bliss.
-Eva
After a few hours, Adam and I went down to watch for a little bit before our serving lunch seva. The swammies were playing music in front of the bhajan stage and were flanked by two large screens displaying live footage of Amma giving Darshan. It is the most beautiful thing to watch. People come to her with their troubles and she consoles them or gives them firm advice. People offer her platters of food, fruit, and flowers, they have their malas blessed, they have photos of long gone loved ones blessed, they cry in Amma's lap, they beam with Amma, and they tell Amma jokes.
Because Adam and I are leaving on Tuesday, we were able to get Darshan tokens ( which are of course free). We had to wait until the very end, after all the Indians had gone. Meanwhile, we showered and put on our white Punjab's and headed for the bhanjan stage to give prasad for the first time. Anyone can give prasad once a day. We were able to sit right next to Amma for two minutes, and hand her prasad( in this case, vibuuti ash[burnt cow dung],and a little candy all rolled up in a small paper pouch). You always have to watch Amma's hand, she will hold it out and then you gently place the prasad in her hand. It is pure bliss.
Afterwards, we ate an early dinner of Masala Dosa( a rice/mung flour slightly sour pancake cooked and filled with potato, onion, mustard seeds, chili leaves, ginger, and other spices I can't distinguish) and watched Amma on screen for about six hours. For those of you who are not familiar with Amma it is typical that she gives darshan for up to or more than 24 hours without a break. She has hugged over 26 million people. It is absolutely incredible. She is Devi; she has merged with the Divine and she is a fully realized Guru. She barely eats or sleeps, and she has gracefully taken on 90% of the worlds karma. A devotee once asked her if he could take on a small fraction of that Karma to relieve Amma. She gave him his wish and he immediately fell unconscious ; the pain was too great.
When I am in Amma's presence I feel a tremendous calm. She is the mother of all, and I feel her love and energy flowing into me and I can't help but cry because it is all so beautiful. I feel eternally grateful to be here with Amma in India.
Adam and I got in the darshan line around 12:30 with the determination and intention to ask Amma for a Mantra. The Mantra is a secret between the guru and the devotee, and I have heard many powerful stories from friends here who have used their mantra in trying times and felt immense relief. As the darshan line snaked its way onto stage, I got closer to Amma and I began to cry, just out of joy. I handed her my mala, and said, "Mantra, Amma." She blessed my beads and placed them around my neck all the while smiling and then she pulled me into her lap for the hug. She smells of jasmine and sandalwood; she is immortal bliss. Holding me for a while, she whispered in my ear, "my daughter, my daughter," and smiled at me once more, pressing prasad into my open palm. Adam was right beside me asking for his Mantra too. She never replies, but just by asking her it means yes!
We squeezed our way off the stage and stood in the mantra queue. The woman in charge asked us if we wanted our mantras to be formless or include a representation of what god means to us: light, love, Amma, etc...
Adam and I chose formless which means Amma gives us a mantra that is best for us. Around 1:15 am, after everyone had been given darshan the mantra queue wormed its way back onto stage with Amma. I knelt down in front of her and she pulled me in, whispering my mantra into my ear, and loud enough so that one of her swammies could hear and write it down. Next, she showered me with flowers, a few got caught in my hair and I kept them close, smelling them. I was in bliss. Adam received his mantra directly after me and minutes later we were given a piece of paper with our mantra written in Sanskrit and explaining their meanings. We were also given instruction on how to use them. This is truly bliss.
-Eva
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Nostalgia At Last...
Several weeks ago I discontinued my cleaning Seva in the western canteen and I am now chopping veggies every morning from 7:00am-9:00am. I am grateful for this Seva. I love the morning, and it almost feels cool until the 9:00am heat sets in. It is nice to lend a hand in the food preparation, and it amazes me how some very offensive vegetables are considered edible.
One morning we were gutting pumpkins and cutting them into bite size pieces and it smelled foul, but no matter--the cooks wanted to use it anyways. They made breads and soups and steamed the pumpkin with beets. I avoid pumpkin now. Once while slicing dates my hands were suddenly covered in little black bugs, so I avoid dates too.
The potatoes are consistently good looking; they never stink and rarely do I have to peel away any tinges of green or rotten parts. The beets are quite sullied and there is no way of getting them clean without peeling off the outside layer, but that is not acceptable here. Absolutely no wasting! Sometimes I grate cheese, or juice limes, or cut contaminated carrots and fetid cabbage.
Most often I cube tomatoes for salad, soup, and sauce. I have quickly learned that the women in charge of the western canteen and the veggie chopping have little discernment when it comes to choosing what makes vegetables edible and what makes vegetables a bovine concern. It is an aberration. I would not see this attitude about what good food means in Wisconsin. Perhaps I am a bit spoiled...
And yes, I feel a pang in my chest when I think about fresh, raw, uncooked, seemingly perfect, DDT free vegetables awaiting me 9,000 miles away. I completely understand the idea of not wasting food and I am obviously in full agreement; however, there is a point where you have to choose between eating rotting food or giving it to the cows or composting it. Such are my woes of India...
Eva
One morning we were gutting pumpkins and cutting them into bite size pieces and it smelled foul, but no matter--the cooks wanted to use it anyways. They made breads and soups and steamed the pumpkin with beets. I avoid pumpkin now. Once while slicing dates my hands were suddenly covered in little black bugs, so I avoid dates too.
The potatoes are consistently good looking; they never stink and rarely do I have to peel away any tinges of green or rotten parts. The beets are quite sullied and there is no way of getting them clean without peeling off the outside layer, but that is not acceptable here. Absolutely no wasting! Sometimes I grate cheese, or juice limes, or cut contaminated carrots and fetid cabbage.
Most often I cube tomatoes for salad, soup, and sauce. I have quickly learned that the women in charge of the western canteen and the veggie chopping have little discernment when it comes to choosing what makes vegetables edible and what makes vegetables a bovine concern. It is an aberration. I would not see this attitude about what good food means in Wisconsin. Perhaps I am a bit spoiled...
And yes, I feel a pang in my chest when I think about fresh, raw, uncooked, seemingly perfect, DDT free vegetables awaiting me 9,000 miles away. I completely understand the idea of not wasting food and I am obviously in full agreement; however, there is a point where you have to choose between eating rotting food or giving it to the cows or composting it. Such are my woes of India...
Eva
Friday, April 23, 2010
Home Song
Oh to be touched, kissed, by the fading sun
A blood spot on the Horizon now
For I am sitting deep in thought
With only the sea to comfort me now
And on the rocks gathered together in fear of loneliness.
I rest my aching feet
And feel the spray of the oceans bliss, lick my toes and spit near my face
And it is fine to fall away from worldly things
That tie me down, like trains, and planes
And silver things that catch my eye
For when I watch the birds up high
Then I think how I can fly
And go as I want from here to there
Without having to pack and brush my hair
And then I think of all my tangles
That are filled with sand and salty sea
Rough and wild, long and free
And I long to be away from here
Home I can trust and wander where I wish
Here is all caution and I can't be me
-Eva
A blood spot on the Horizon now
For I am sitting deep in thought
With only the sea to comfort me now
And on the rocks gathered together in fear of loneliness.
I rest my aching feet
And feel the spray of the oceans bliss, lick my toes and spit near my face
And it is fine to fall away from worldly things
That tie me down, like trains, and planes
And silver things that catch my eye
For when I watch the birds up high
Then I think how I can fly
And go as I want from here to there
Without having to pack and brush my hair
And then I think of all my tangles
That are filled with sand and salty sea
Rough and wild, long and free
And I long to be away from here
Home I can trust and wander where I wish
Here is all caution and I can't be me
-Eva
Eating With Our Hands
About two weeks ago now, we had the great pleasure of eating an extravagant Indian feast using our hands as utensils. It began like this....
Sixteen days after an Indian funeral( in this specific case Amma's fathers death) it is traditional to take the ashes that remain from the cremation and transfer them to hand-woven baskets made out of coconut palm leaves and then empty them into the river; however, this part of the ceremony was preformed the day after the cremation because Amma had to go on tour to Australia and would therefore not be present here at the Ashram during the sixteenth day celebration. This of course did not exempt the sixteenth day from being celebrated. The cremation sight was strewn thick with pink flowers and there were many Pujas taking place throughout the day in a temporally constructed hut made from palm leaves.
Adam and I had been in town using the internet, and as we strolled back across the bridge to the Ashram, we saw about 2,000 people gathered on the river bank in front of Amma's fathers house. A beautiful silk tapestry had been hung, enclosing a packed eating area. There were lots of tables and chairs set up, and we got ushered into what appeared total chaos; people washing their faces and spitting on the ground. Many westerners there were utterly confused (us included!), unsure if we were really supposed to be there.
After about 5 minutes of waiting, Adam and I were seated at a table next to two Indian men who had traveled to the Ashram specifically for the feast. As soon, as we had settled in and kicked our feet in the sand under the table, a banana leaf was placed in front of each of us and Indian women immediately began plopping, mango chutney, rice, dhal, spicy ginger chutney, curry, papadum( a chrispy chip thing)on our brilliantly green leafy plates. And then to top it off they filled our cups with a hot, sweet tea to cool the palette from the intense spice we were about to become familiar with.
We dived in with our fingers, pushing the food into our mouths with our thumbs. It was much easier than anticipated. The men next to us showed us how to mix some rice and dhal until it became sticky and then to crush some papdum on top and scoop it up into our mouths. It was exciting and spicy, and we agreed that it was the best meal we had had in India. And I still can't compare any food I have eaten since to that feast.
So, when we now eat Indian food, we eat it with our hands, unless we can't endure the spice, because it is much easier to inflame your lips when you are pushing food into your mouth with your hands than when you are using a spoon and being dainty(they only have spoons here).
-Eva
Sixteen days after an Indian funeral( in this specific case Amma's fathers death) it is traditional to take the ashes that remain from the cremation and transfer them to hand-woven baskets made out of coconut palm leaves and then empty them into the river; however, this part of the ceremony was preformed the day after the cremation because Amma had to go on tour to Australia and would therefore not be present here at the Ashram during the sixteenth day celebration. This of course did not exempt the sixteenth day from being celebrated. The cremation sight was strewn thick with pink flowers and there were many Pujas taking place throughout the day in a temporally constructed hut made from palm leaves.
Adam and I had been in town using the internet, and as we strolled back across the bridge to the Ashram, we saw about 2,000 people gathered on the river bank in front of Amma's fathers house. A beautiful silk tapestry had been hung, enclosing a packed eating area. There were lots of tables and chairs set up, and we got ushered into what appeared total chaos; people washing their faces and spitting on the ground. Many westerners there were utterly confused (us included!), unsure if we were really supposed to be there.
After about 5 minutes of waiting, Adam and I were seated at a table next to two Indian men who had traveled to the Ashram specifically for the feast. As soon, as we had settled in and kicked our feet in the sand under the table, a banana leaf was placed in front of each of us and Indian women immediately began plopping, mango chutney, rice, dhal, spicy ginger chutney, curry, papadum( a chrispy chip thing)on our brilliantly green leafy plates. And then to top it off they filled our cups with a hot, sweet tea to cool the palette from the intense spice we were about to become familiar with.
We dived in with our fingers, pushing the food into our mouths with our thumbs. It was much easier than anticipated. The men next to us showed us how to mix some rice and dhal until it became sticky and then to crush some papdum on top and scoop it up into our mouths. It was exciting and spicy, and we agreed that it was the best meal we had had in India. And I still can't compare any food I have eaten since to that feast.
So, when we now eat Indian food, we eat it with our hands, unless we can't endure the spice, because it is much easier to inflame your lips when you are pushing food into your mouth with your hands than when you are using a spoon and being dainty(they only have spoons here).
-Eva
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Monkey Business!
This guy has been around the Ashram for the past several days. He's pretty funny-- always messing with the crows and yawning, showing off his massive teeth.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
An Indian New Year
Today is the Kerala, Indian new year. There are three different Pujas taking place today. The one I went to began at 4:00am. Being dehydrated and exhausted made me inert and reluctant to get out of bed, but I knew I would probably never experience something like this again. I did a quick tooth brushing and hurriedly got dressed. I elected to take the elevator which was unfortunately filled with bees buzzing around the light. I crouched low, almost touching the filthy mat and waited the nine story decent to the ground.
The outside air was surprisingly cool and very refreshing compared to the stuffy-hot room Adam and I are occupying. I immediately detected a sweet smell of jasmine and it only became more noticeable the closer I walked to the Kalari(where most of the Pujas are performed). The Kalari was unsurprisingly packed full of people, overflowing out of the doorways. The energy was calm and all eyes were fixed on the inner most shrine room, nestled in the back part of the Kalari.
Being a pretty short person, there wasn't a chance of seeing over the sea of heads. I stood there in silence, taking in all the beauty; a metal tree with little dishes filled with oil and wicks, burning strong and illuminating the darkness; subtle orange and yellow flowers strung together and hanging from the entrance and all inside the Kalari; a man holding a gold spoon which held the burning camphor. As he would pass people, they would bring the flame close to their heads and bring the smoke close to their faces. I'm not sure of the significance of this, but I did it anyways.
I was soon ushered into a queue by a squat, watery-eyed Indian man. The Indian people here are not idle; they are constantly moving, working, praying, and graciously telling me how to participate in the ceremonies and so often nudging me forward into the queue. They tell me I need to be more pushy. If you are not pushy and assertive here, you will get budged in line and it won't be considered rude. As soon as I got one foot in the door of the Kalari, I noticed ornate white markings painted on the floor. Again, I am unsure of their meaning, but they are present every time a Puja is taking place.
On my right a young Indian girl in a saffron and red sari was beautifully singing, accompanied by an older man beating a drum. As the queue moved deeper into the small space of the Kalari, I could see people touching their hands to a stone carving of Ganesha(the elephant god, the remover of obstacles) hung precariously on the wall. I did not feel the call to touch it myself, but just gazed on its beauty. As I reached the inner part of the space I was able to kneel down in the doorway of the tiny shrine room. There were more fascinating symbols painted on the threshold and in the middle of the room was a large Amma doll ordained with many jewels and necklaces. On both her sides stood two beautifully blue Krishna figures, their peacock plumes standing out to me. Spread around Amma's feet were many plates of fresh fruit, most recognizably coconuts, grains , sweets, flowers, and burning camphor. People were also offering money as they bent down to pray. I gazed at the scene for some time, I was mollified by the light, the sweet smells, and the music. Then touching my hand to the threshold and placing it on my heart I led myself out of the Kalari to receive Prasad.
First a drop of turmeric paste was placed in my hand and I used my ring finger to mush it onto my third eye(you are not supposed to use your pointer finger to do this because it represents the ego). Next, holy water and tulasi( basil) were placed in my hand. It is customary to take a taste of the water and then dab the rest on the top of your head (your crown chakra). After doing this with the utmost effort not to do anything too sheepish, I received several different kinds of sweets. I have not idea what they were made out of , but I ate them and some were sweet, savory, and one was fried.
The whole experience was extremely calming and I almost felt a since of renewal and a definite boost of energy afterward. I knew Adam would want to come down and be a part of the Kerala new year, even though he told me he didn't want to wake up. I rushed up the stairs and and roused him from a sound sleep. He is quite the deep sleeper. Sometimes he looks like he is awake, but don't be fooled because he is probably still fast asleep! It didn't take any convincing to get Adam to come to the ceremony . We rushed to the Kalari and he went through all the same motions as I did, but I can't say that we experienced that same thing. While I waited outside for Adam to receive Prasad I focused all of my attention on one thought for the Indian new year--may all beings in all the worlds be happy.
-Eva
The outside air was surprisingly cool and very refreshing compared to the stuffy-hot room Adam and I are occupying. I immediately detected a sweet smell of jasmine and it only became more noticeable the closer I walked to the Kalari(where most of the Pujas are performed). The Kalari was unsurprisingly packed full of people, overflowing out of the doorways. The energy was calm and all eyes were fixed on the inner most shrine room, nestled in the back part of the Kalari.
Being a pretty short person, there wasn't a chance of seeing over the sea of heads. I stood there in silence, taking in all the beauty; a metal tree with little dishes filled with oil and wicks, burning strong and illuminating the darkness; subtle orange and yellow flowers strung together and hanging from the entrance and all inside the Kalari; a man holding a gold spoon which held the burning camphor. As he would pass people, they would bring the flame close to their heads and bring the smoke close to their faces. I'm not sure of the significance of this, but I did it anyways.
I was soon ushered into a queue by a squat, watery-eyed Indian man. The Indian people here are not idle; they are constantly moving, working, praying, and graciously telling me how to participate in the ceremonies and so often nudging me forward into the queue. They tell me I need to be more pushy. If you are not pushy and assertive here, you will get budged in line and it won't be considered rude. As soon as I got one foot in the door of the Kalari, I noticed ornate white markings painted on the floor. Again, I am unsure of their meaning, but they are present every time a Puja is taking place.
On my right a young Indian girl in a saffron and red sari was beautifully singing, accompanied by an older man beating a drum. As the queue moved deeper into the small space of the Kalari, I could see people touching their hands to a stone carving of Ganesha(the elephant god, the remover of obstacles) hung precariously on the wall. I did not feel the call to touch it myself, but just gazed on its beauty. As I reached the inner part of the space I was able to kneel down in the doorway of the tiny shrine room. There were more fascinating symbols painted on the threshold and in the middle of the room was a large Amma doll ordained with many jewels and necklaces. On both her sides stood two beautifully blue Krishna figures, their peacock plumes standing out to me. Spread around Amma's feet were many plates of fresh fruit, most recognizably coconuts, grains , sweets, flowers, and burning camphor. People were also offering money as they bent down to pray. I gazed at the scene for some time, I was mollified by the light, the sweet smells, and the music. Then touching my hand to the threshold and placing it on my heart I led myself out of the Kalari to receive Prasad.
First a drop of turmeric paste was placed in my hand and I used my ring finger to mush it onto my third eye(you are not supposed to use your pointer finger to do this because it represents the ego). Next, holy water and tulasi( basil) were placed in my hand. It is customary to take a taste of the water and then dab the rest on the top of your head (your crown chakra). After doing this with the utmost effort not to do anything too sheepish, I received several different kinds of sweets. I have not idea what they were made out of , but I ate them and some were sweet, savory, and one was fried.
The whole experience was extremely calming and I almost felt a since of renewal and a definite boost of energy afterward. I knew Adam would want to come down and be a part of the Kerala new year, even though he told me he didn't want to wake up. I rushed up the stairs and and roused him from a sound sleep. He is quite the deep sleeper. Sometimes he looks like he is awake, but don't be fooled because he is probably still fast asleep! It didn't take any convincing to get Adam to come to the ceremony . We rushed to the Kalari and he went through all the same motions as I did, but I can't say that we experienced that same thing. While I waited outside for Adam to receive Prasad I focused all of my attention on one thought for the Indian new year--may all beings in all the worlds be happy.
-Eva
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